Becoming free

My years long ago in isolated huts and villages, gave me time and space to consolidate a core foundation Awareness. However I came to realize one part only of my spiritual journey, which was of a reclusive isolative nature. That I was 50% complete or 50% incomplete! It did take me another forty years to resolve the rest.

The underlying and sometimes automatic subconscious thread of devotion to God still worked for me to enable a Grace that made practical the therapy, recovery, mental wellness, and strength or fortitude. The Western world and my ordinary existence of family, work, and finances has enabled me to understand how the esoteric Eastern based philosophy of Shakti providing true understanding or spirituality. It’s at all levels, through all cultures, and also props up the formless non-dual concepts of Vedanta enabling it to be, not just for monks, as traditionally it had been.

We should be now in the moment, being present, and if we are not really feeling it we should be using all the spiritual practice tools at our disposal. Prayer, mantra, meditation, or other means. Then there is no excuse, only self-responsibility. There is only the requirement to do what is needed moment to moment and “get on with it”. Deal with it, function and provide solutions, as far as one can. Beyond that we are at the mercy of our God!

The Guides say we are all Divine, and we all live in a Divine world that is undifferentiated in the sense that this perspective/belief is for everybody. All persons have equal opportunity as they are all by birthright Divine beings, in their bodies and human lives. This is way more accessible than Vedanta which was really the domain of sannyasins and swamis, initially in India. It is still often seen as being a philosophy in the domain of renunciation and monastic leanings.

Vedanta says Aham Brahma Asmi. I am the Divine or Cosmic Consciousness and the world is Maya. (Illusory). This can be seen as religion without a God, and has similarities to Buddhism, which evolved in India post Upanishads. (The scriptures defining Vedanta, which were written at a later stage of the Vedas. (Veda plus anta = Vedanta). The Guides speak through their writing & the words that come across sounds to me very much like my philosophy of the Vedanta, placed into much more modern terminology and perspective. The goal the Guides propose, is to stay or live in the Higher Rooms where one lives as ones higher self, which then allows all the answers to life questions to flow spontaneously.

The Guides words have made it very clear to me that this “I am Divine’, is for the present times for all. This is what we need now in what is a chaotic world of darkness. I had never seen my divine Shakti in a concrete vision, but have felt the presence for a long time of a male spirit that has guided me or at least supported me. This personal presence completely resonated in agreement with what the Guides were saying, and I could re identify with elements of my “monk person” that I had held for so many years. Then I started to feel the female guide spirit & now there is a combination. (Read on for more about this later).

Also seek the guru within as well as without. The Vedanta teachers say that when we ask ourselves, who am I, we are trying to find out what the true nature of the “I” is. Not mind, not body, but an unchanging entity, that remains constant through childhood to old age. It is the self within the Atman which is the same substance as the Cosmic Soul. All the teachers of this way point out not only the importance of the guru, but also of the Deity that one surrenders to. The guru within will also be a guide who directs towards the highest energies.

One of my gurus in India, Swami Muktananda, was somewhat scathing when I turned up to his ashram in my robes speaking Hindi and looking like a swami. He said in about two sentences: “you’re always going to be English, no matter how Indian or Hindu you try to be. And what’s wrong with Christianity”? I did not really except he had said those words. I pretended he hadn’t. It took me a long time to see what he said was absolutely true.

With attraction to the Divine comes a natural tendency to serve others, & that is for me a keystone of Christianity. It is in place, even if I have been a bit driven at times by excessive, obsessive, or pleasure seeking type common human behaviors. I can see the goodness in the mistakes I made, but now can say it’s no longer about mistakes, they are just enriching experiences. I prefer to call them learning experiences. As long as I can still serve others then I am still on the right path!

Though quite different from Christian views, the marble form of the idol in the temple is a means to help with spiritual practice. It is not worship of a piece of marble, rather a useful means of purifying a psycho emotional mental deficit, and an activity done with a view to developing concentration and awareness. The purpose of any external devotion is that the true nature of ones Divine self becomes self-evident into all levels of one’s human form and existence.

Although I feel and talk of the Divine Spirit including religious reference, it is also useful in to place it in view of life experiences in terms of mental wellness, addictive behaviors, and pleasure seeking lifestyles. (All the baggage that goes with normal human behaviors out there in life and the universe). The real need is to remain focused on the goal of coming to the Divine awareness, and then find the inner true guru, & to what you know you are in essence. 

Your guides: they are you and have purpose as separate, only to take you to awareness of the Truth, which coincides with the loss of the lower self through transcendence of your ego tendencies. Then you don’t need gurus, you are the Guru!

This is the wakening to the day of the light. Whatever religion or spiritual pathway has got you so far. The purifying benefits in terms of ego transcendence leads to dimming or disappearance of the psycho emotional and addictive tendencies that cause so much havoc in so-called civilized society.

Because I see the Universal Spirit as manifesting through a power of the Shakti or Goddess creative Maya, I accept that the energy of Shakti has to be brought into real life. I see the need to deal with and understand this energy as essentially a female aspect of Divinity, without negating the other male aspects of energy in the cosmos. I.e. Is the Cosmic Consciousness – male?

Transactions of ego in the all matters, (including psychosexual, and romantic), after I left India, required of me to accept the mental distresses experienced. That meant that the type of existence I continued with for many years thereafter, submerged my spiritual journey into a more common mode of survival. I forgot any kudos I had gleaned as an ex-holy-man. I think I had to become a humble-man not a holy-man.

Life events can be seen as an actions directed by a force, based on which choice is made by the individual. Such choices, and then endeavors, range from choosing a totally materialistic or even animalistic life style, to choosing a spiritual one, with all manner of variation in between. The concept of destiny does not make me fatalistic, rather more optimistic, cheerful and serene, due to knowing the true role of the outcome of that destiny. Destiny is my self-responsibility, and what happens is a function of the cosmic laws. Because I believe and feel the central Divinity of the Cosmos, I accept the pain as well as the pleasure of life equally and with equanimity, (because all experience is part of that Divinity).

I made my choices and then sat or fell back unable to process: Life and the Universe. My life was unmanageable, and that is when the Divine has come down in the form of grace. And this is spirit guidance. It’s a surrender thing! I have realized that the mind’s activities are transient and fickle, and the light of yogic awareness burns steadily behind the mental screens. We reach the transcendental through the awareness of the light. Through our deepest subconscious, we can return to our chosen life of being one with Divinity flowing down to all levels of our human endeavor.

The True Self within is so near and yet so hard to find. All the yogis and gurus, they must recommend you ask the question:

Who am I?